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Diddy’s Lawyer Blames Costco for Baby Oil Hoard: A Comedic Defence Strategy

Date:

 

In one of the most bizarre turns in the ongoing Diddy case, his lawyer has made an eyebrow-raising claim: the rapper’s alleged stash of baby oil—reportedly 1,000 bottles—could be explained by a simple bulk purchase from Costco. Yes, you read that right.

The Case of the Mysterious Baby Oil

Marc Agnifilo, Diddy’s legal counsel, is pushing the narrative that when it comes to bulk shopping, Diddy is just a regular guy who loves a good deal.

“[Diddy] has a big house. He buys in bulk. I think they have Costcos in every place where he has a home,” Agnifilo quipped during an interview with TMZ’s Harvey Levin.

But let’s unpack this claim.

Why Baby Oil?

Before diving into the logistics of Costco shopping, it’s crucial to consider why there’s so much baby oil involved in this case. The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) raided Diddy’s homes and reportedly discovered a vast quantity of the product.

Agnifilo stated, “I don’t think it was a thousand. Let’s just say it was a lot.”

So, while the exact number may be disputed, the sheer volume raises eyebrows. What exactly does Diddy need with all that baby oil?

The Comedic Spin on Serious Charges

Agnifilo is not just fighting the legal battle; he’s attempting to win the public relations war.

In a surprising attempt to reframe Diddy’s alleged “Freak Offs” parties, Agnifilo remarked, “Back when I was a kid in the late ’70s, they were called threesomes.”

While this may be an attempt at levity, it doesn’t distract from the gravity of the charges—racketeering and human trafficking—that Diddy faces in a New York City federal courthouse.

The Costco Connection

Agnifilo seems convinced that a simple trip to Costco explains everything. He noted, “I mean, have you sat in a parking lot of a Costco and seen what people walk out of there with?”

It’s a relatable argument: many of us are guilty of buying in bulk. But is it really plausible that Diddy went to Costco and stocked up on baby oil like a vending machine operator hoarding soda cans?

The Realities of Bulk Buying

Let’s take a closer look at the feasibility of Diddy’s alleged shopping spree:

  • Costco’s Offerings: A quick check of Costco’s online store shows that they don’t typically sell baby oil in bulk quantities like they do with pasta or snacks.
  • Receipt Challenge: If Agnifilo wants to substantiate his claim, he needs to present the receipts. Without proof, his narrative lacks credibility.

Imagine Diddy pulling up in his SUV, loading up dozens of bottles of baby oil like he’s preparing for a summer BBQ. The image is almost too ludicrous to take seriously.

The Questions We Need to Ask

While we can chuckle at the absurdity of the situation, it also prompts some serious questions:

  • Is this really a valid defence?
  • What kind of image is this painting of Diddy as a client?
  • Can we expect a Costco-themed defence strategy to hold up in court?

What’s Next for Diddy?

As this case unfolds, it remains to be seen how effective Agnifilo’s unorthodox strategies will be.

One thing is clear: if Diddy is relying on Costco as a key part of his defence, he might need to rethink his approach.

While the laughter may lighten the mood, the legal implications are serious. Diddy faces real charges, and his lawyer’s antics, while entertaining, may not be the best strategy for navigating the courtroom.

Conclusion: The Seriousness Behind the Laughs

In a world where celebrity legal battles often take unexpected turns, the Diddy case is no exception. While his lawyer’s claims about Costco are amusing, they highlight the lengths to which some will go in the name of defence.

For now, we’ll keep an eye on how this case unfolds. Whether or not Costco becomes a major player in the courtroom drama remains to be seen.

But if Agnifilo can’t back up his claims with concrete evidence, he might just end up dragging Costco’s name through the mud unnecessarily.

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